The Twilight Saga: New Moon Review

Soap Opera on the Big Screen
Okay, I’ll admit it – I’ve never read any of the Twilight books. Why? Is it because I don’t love vampire stories? Wrong O! I’ve been reading stuff about vampires since I first started reading as a kid. On top of which I’ve also seen almost every blood-sucking flick and show as well, including the Twilight films. So why haven’t I read the book? In short, I am really busy and I don’t have a lot of time to read fiction. In honesty, they seem more geared towards the ladies, like some Harlequin romance novel. So now that I have watched the latest Twilight film, I believe my suspicions are correct – the Twilight films are nothing more than “Soap Opera on the Big Screen.” And just as daytime soaps are popular for their steamy romance and lovers’ spats, so are these films. In other words, the movies are more about romance than they are about vampires.

Having said that, I really thought there were a few really cool vampire moments in the film. Yet I still struggled to stay awake during most of the film. Of course, anytime I started to drift asleep, adult women and teen-age girls panting and screaming over some actor taking his shirt off or appearing topless immediately wakened me. Don’t get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with films appealing to a certain gender. I can think of plenty of films I saw in the theater where guys and teen-age boys reacted the same to some sexy actress. However, I guess that’s my real gripe with “Twilight: New Moon.” To be frank, there is nothing of real substance here. The only engaging part of the story is its trite plotline of “Will the boy get the girl?” Hear me out, as a guy who loves a good romantic flick, some of my favorite movies have this plotline (e.g., “Sleepless in Seattle, and “While You Were Sleeping”). Yet, those movies also had other story elements that made the movie great.

I guess another boring bit about the movie is its characters. For example, the character of Bella can be summarized like this: I love you, don’t leave me, and please make me a vampire. The other two lead actors can also be summarized in similar fashion: I love you, I promise not to leave, and maybe I will make you a vampire/werewolf wife.  To that, Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and Taylor Lautner do an excellent job playing their parts. I don’t think they could have gotten a better cast to match these roles. Yet despite their talents, there is nothing new under the moon here in terms of complex characters.

Another thing that put me off was the fact that there wasn’t enough action in this movie. Who knows, maybe it’s because I am a guy who likes red meat. I thought the werewolf action-scenes were well done, but there could have been more moments that moved us beyond just sappy romance and depression. Let’s face it – there was a huge amount of the movie dedicated to showing us scenes with Bella basically pouting in pain. I understand the director needed to make the audience feel her loneliness and isolation, but I think that could have been accomplished in a shorter time span, thereby allowing more action on the screen. Heck, I would have settled for just some more blood and gore. I know that may sound like typical vampire stuff, but who cares; it would have at least kept my eyelids from drooping repeatedly.

All in all, those who have read the Twilight books have described “New Moon” as the worse in the series – a worse yet necessary step in moving the story forward. Since I have not read any of the books, I am going to have to assume that’s true based on my boring experience with this film. Here’s hoping the third Twilight movie is more than just some soap opera and that it will finally offer us vampire fans something to thirst after.

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